When it has become your life…

Okay so maybe I only have handful of readers. And maybe I messed up my last two blogs that are out there forever and I am leaving it that way because I am embracing my mess. In Talking to my partner even in our lows he helped me to see that grief has become my life.
Even as a child I knew loss which really should not be but it is true. So when in my mid-twenties I decided I needed to work on being happy that meant looking into my grief closet and finally dealing with pain. I had not up to that point really felt anything because I had been taught to be numb so the topics of grief and loss are my life and one can be taught to deal with it but being familiar with it. Whew!!! Is well what you need to really be helpful to someone else.
What is interesting couples are the worst with each other because I think of intense emotions; they expect more of each other. Families too in some ways. But we all as neighbors suck with our pleasantries of get over it, the past is the past, time will heal all wounds and etc, etc, etc.., in my KING & I voice.

Just a reminder you are not alone and we are in the process of becoming just last night; I regressed. Twenty-two years of working on grieving the same thing and I regressed like I was back in that hospital room… Told you I am a hot mess but God loves me and calls me as I AM!

It is all good. It is time for us to recognize that this is our moment to take a breath, look around, appreciate life, ourselves, what we have and go after what we want. Love conquers all and you can’t hold that in…

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